Order of Book Series
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Carlton Mellick III Books in Order

Carlton Mellick III has written 68 books, published between 2000 and 2025. The first book is Sunset With A Beard (2000) and the newest is Scorpion Ranch (2025). Publication order is the reading order below.

Books
68
Published
2000–2025
Pages on record
9,201 in 54 of 68 books
Reading time
153–230 hours

Reading time is an estimate, not a recorded figure: 9,201 pages at 300 words a page, read at 200–300 words a minute, covering the 54 of 68 titles with a page count on record.

See all 68 books in order Printable Carlton Mellick III checklist
Photo of Carlton Mellick III, author of the Bizarro Starter Kit series

Carlton Mellick III is an American author, born 2 July 1977 and based in Portland, Oregon. Mellick is one of the leading writers of Bizarro fiction, an underground movement that sets schlock science fiction and horror next to postmodern literary art. The novels build surreal versions of earth, in the present and in imagined futures, and aim at social absurdity and satire. The catalogue holds 68 books, from Sunset With A Beard (2000) through Satan Burger (2001) to Scorpion Ranch (2025).

How many Carlton Mellick III books are there?

Carlton Mellick III has 68 books, released between 2000 and 2025. 1 of them belong to the Bizarro Starter Kit series.

Carlton Mellick III Books in Publication Order

The table lists all 68 Carlton Mellick III books in the order they were published, with the release year, the page count where one is on record, and how many independent book listings confirm each title. Catalogue data as of September 2026.

  1. Cover of Satan Burger by Carlton Mellick III (2001)
  2. Cover of Electric Jesus Corpse by Carlton Mellick III (2002)
  3. Cover of Razor Wire Pubic Hair by Carlton Mellick III (2003)
  4. Cover of The Baby Jesus Butt Plug by Carlton Mellick III (2004)
  5. Cover of Fishy-Fleshed by Carlton Mellick III (2004)
  6. Cover of Punk Land by Carlton Mellick III (2005)
  7. Cover of The Menstruating Mall by Carlton Mellick III (2005)
  8. Cover of Sex and Death in Television Town by Carlton Mellick III (2005)
  9. Cover of The Bizarro Starter Kit by Carlton Mellick III, book 1 of the Bizarro Starter Kit series (2006)
  10. Cover of Teeth and Tongue Landscape by Carlton Mellick III (2006)
  11. Cover of The Haunted Vagina by Carlton Mellick III (2006)
  12. Cover of Sea of the Patchwork Cats by Carlton Mellick III (2006)
  13. Cover of War Slut by Carlton Mellick III (2006)
  14. Cover of Adolf in Wonderland by Carlton Mellick III (2007)
  15. Cover of The Egg Man by Carlton Mellick III (2008)
  16. Cover of Ultra F*ckers by Carlton Mellick III (2008)
  17. Cover of Cybernetrix by Carlton Mellick III (2008)
  18. Cover of Apeshit by Carlton Mellick III (2008)
  19. Cover of The Cannibals of Candyland by Carlton Mellick III (2009)
  20. Cover of Warrior Wolf Women of the Wasteland by Carlton Mellick III (2009)
  21. Cover of Christmas on Crack by Carlton Mellick III (2010)
  22. Cover of The Kobold Wizard's Dildo of Enlightenment by Carlton Mellick III (2010)
  23. Cover of Zombies and Shit by Carlton Mellick III (2010)
  24. Cover of Barbarian Beast Bitches of the Badlands by Carlton Mellick III (2011)
  1. 1
    Sunset With A Beard2000 · confirmed 1/4
    2000–
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  2. 2
    Satan Burger2001 · 236 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2001236
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  3. 3
    Electric Jesus Corpse2002 · 384 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2002384
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  4. 4
    Razor Wire Pubic Hair2003 · 92 pages · confirmed 1/4
    200392
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  5. 5
    The Baby Jesus Butt Plug2004 · 92 pages · confirmed 1/4
    200492
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  6. 6
    Fishy-Fleshed2004 · 110 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2004110
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  7. 7
    Punk Land2005 · 284 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2005284
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  8. 8
    The Menstruating Mall2005 · 104 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2005104
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  9. 9
    Sex and Death in Television Town2005 · 130 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2005130
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  10. 10
    The Bizarro Starter KitBizarro Starter Kit #12006 · 236 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2006236
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  11. 11
    Teeth and Tongue Landscape2006 · 96 pages · confirmed 1/4
    200696
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  12. 12
    Sausagey Santa2006 · 132 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2006132
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  13. 13
    The Haunted Vagina2006 · 120 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2006120
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  14. 14
    Sea of the Patchwork Cats2006 · 96 pages · confirmed 1/4
    200696
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  15. 15
    War Slut2006 · 116 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2006116
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  16. 16
    Adolf in Wonderland2007 · 140 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2007140
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  17. 17
    The Egg Man2008 · 150 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2008150
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  18. 18
    Ultra F*ckers2008 · 120 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2008120
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  19. 19
    Cybernetrix2008 · 190 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2008190
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  20. 20
    Apeshit2008 · 180 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2008180
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  21. 21
    The Cannibals of Candyland2009 · 164 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2009164
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  22. 22
    Warrior Wolf Women of the Wasteland2009 · 300 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2009300
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  23. 23
    The Faggiest Vampire2009 · 104 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2009104
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  24. 24
    Christmas on Crack2010 · 168 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2010168
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  25. 25
    The Kobold Wizard's Dildo of Enlightenment2010 · 215 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2010215
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  26. 26
    Zombies and Shit2010 · 292 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2010292
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  27. 27
    Barbarian Beast Bitches of the Badlands2011 · 284 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2011284
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  28. 28
    I Knocked Up Satan's Daughter2011 · 152 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2011152
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  29. 29
    Armadillo Fists2011 · 168 pages · confirmed 1/4
    2011168
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK
  30. 30
    Crab Town2011 · 85 pages · confirmed 1/4
    201185
    Buy at Amazon USAmazon UK

Carlton Mellick III books grouped by series

Each title below is a row in the publication-order table above. None of these groups has a reading-order page of its own on this site.

Bizarro Starter Kit in order

1 book
  1. 1. The Bizarro Starter Kit

Standalone books

67 books

67 Carlton Mellick III titles here are not listed as part of any series.

Do you have to read Carlton Mellick III books in order?

You only need to read Carlton Mellick III books in order within the Bizarro Starter Kit series, which holds 1 of the 68 Carlton Mellick III books listed here. The numbered table above gives every book in publication order.

Where to start with Carlton Mellick III

Start with Sunset With A Beard (2000), the earliest published title.

What is the newest Carlton Mellick III book?

Scorpion Ranch (2025) is the newest Carlton Mellick III book released so far.

Is there a new Carlton Mellick III book coming?

No next Carlton Mellick III book is announced in the catalogue, which is a gap in the listings it merges rather than a sign that the run has ended.

Carlton Mellick III at a glance

Still publishing
Carlton Mellick III published a book as recently as 2025.
Release pace
Carlton Mellick III books have appeared more than one a year on average.
Length
9,201 pages across the 54 of 68 books with a recorded length, a median of 151 pages each.
Busiest decade
Most Carlton Mellick III books, 35 of 68, were published in the 2010s.

What the Carlton Mellick III books are about

13 of the 68 Carlton Mellick III books carry subject tags in Open Library's catalogue. The subjects below are the ones that recur across them, most frequent first: horror is tagged on 3 of 13. The subjects are cataloguers’ headings, not a plot summary.